Gifts
With his bare hands, my big brother Devin can crush a lump of coal into a PlayStation 5. Pressure makes diamonds, sure. But for Devin, pressure makes video games. An Xbox 360. The new Call of Duty. A Nintendo Switch. Everyone has a gift. And, over the years, Devin’s gift has saved me about twenty thousand dollars (maybe more). So you can see why I reacted the way I did that night in his den. My older brother faced a roaring fire with worried eyes, swirling a glass of red with his magic left hand.
Devin said, “I mean it, I’m done. No more crushing coal into video games.”
Every holiday I prepare for this moment, but the shock still made me dizzy. It was the week before Christmas, and I needed games and systems for my five children!
“Let’s talk about it,” I said.
“No. All you do is talk. Not this time. Sony, Nintendo, Microsoft — I’ve robbed them for decades. It isn’t right!”
Like I said, everyone has a gift. Mine kicked into gear. “Robbing Nintendo? Dev, buddy. They’re worth billions! Crushing some coal so your nieces and nephews have a good Christmas, that’s not hurting Mario and Luigi.”
Devin sipped his wine dismissively. “Listen up, idiot. This is about morality. Right and wrong. We only get one shot at this thing called life.”
My big brother, always so dramatic. “You know the story of Robin Hood?”
Devin’s forehead wrinkled. “Steal from the rich, give to the poor. Hmmm. I never considered the Robin Hood angle. You’re right. There are different degrees of crime.”
“Literally. Felonies through infractions. Plus, these corporations don’t care about the customer.”
The fire popped in the fireplace. “Maybe. But in this case, the stealing isn’t justified. If I was turning coal into, say, loaves of bread for the hungry, things might be different.”
“Not necessarily. Superheroes smash up entire cities, small businesses and all. They don’t let millions in property damages stop them. They choose the greater good.”
“The greater good… you’re saying that, instead of focusing on the negative aspects of my crimes, I should focus on how happy I’m making your kids?”
“Partially, bro. Yeah. Happiness, but not for the sake of simple retail therapy. Kids now-adays, they’re so mean about video games. If you don’t have the latest and greatest, you’re basically an outcast. Give your nieces and nephews the gift of social relevancy this Christmas.”
Devin let out a laugh. “You think I’m stupid. You once again saved the shopping until last minute. Is everything sold out? Either that or you’re being cheap.”
“Sure, Dev. If you must know, I’m a little late with the shopping. And, yeah, things aren’t so great for me down at work.” I pretended to lose patience, stomping my snow boot on his shag carpet. “But, come on! Helping my kids, saving me money. Those are whatever. The real reason you need to do this is because you can’t waste your gift.”
“That’s not fair.”
“Not fair. No one else in human history can crush coal into a Sega Genesis. Every morning I wake up wishing I could turn a black rock into a Game Boy Advance. Unfortunately, wishing for gifts doesn’t work.”
“Just because I can do something, that doesn’t mean I have to.”
“Is that what you would tell the creator of the universe? That even though they gave you a gift, it shouldn’t be shared?” I knew Devin believed someone or something created the universe. And I used it against him.
Devin hesitated. “You mean… why would the creator of the universe give me this ability, if they didn’t want me to use it?”
“Exactly.”
Devin sipped wine, thinking out loud: “Whatever made me, it wasn’t an accident. Therefore my gift wasn’t an accident. Interesting. Another unconsidered angle.” My brother thought it through some more, blinking at the blazing fire. “You’re right. Bu —”
I hopped out of the leather recliner. I gave my big brother a hug. “You’re thinking clearly again, you gorgeous moron. Of course we can’t waste our gifts. Now, I need five systems. A PlaySta —”
“Hang on. You’re right. But even though the creator of the universe made me this way, I see it as a test. They’re testing how I’ll use the gift. They’re studying my response. No, brother. My coal-crushing-video-game days are done. You can tell the kiddos sorry, but their uncle’s retired.”
We were made the way we were made for a reason. Be thankful for that. I know I am. The fork in the road forced me left, and my gift was ready for it. Had been for years.
“Fine, Dev,” I said, a wide smile gracing my face. “You win. You’re the boss. Let’s drop this talk of coal crushing and video games.” I reached in my bag, producing two bottles of red wine. “I bought a Bordeaux and a Pinot. Which first?”
“Now there’s the little brother I know and love! Pinot, of course.”
I poured the first few glasses, and the rest was history. I didn’t succeed in persuading Devin to crush coal into video games. I did, however, succeed in persuading him to get ripped. There’s always a way forward with my gift. And when Devin passed out in his recliner from too much booze, I trudged outside through two feet of snow to my truck for a bag of coal. Once back inside the den, I opened my brother’s hand. I placed the black rock in his palm.“It’s important we don’t waste our gifts,” I said, now controlling both Devin’s hands. The last step was in front of me. I shouted, “Nintendo Switch!” And brought my brother’s palms together. A loud POP pierced the cozy room.
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