Johnny America


List of Our Kind Patrons

John­ny Amer­i­ca is a col­lec­tive labor of love from its edi­tors and con­trib­u­tors. In an effort to give some small token of thanks to the strangers who are kind enough to share their work with us, and the col­lec­tive Inter­net, we’ve start­ed a dona­tion page over at Patre­on.

Our edi­tors are and will always remain unpaid but mod­e­lesque, but we’d sure love to give each and every author a nice bot­tle of wine, deli­cious bean bur­ri­to, or some oth­er treat to say thank-you. The kind patrons below are help­ing sup­port our con­trib­u­tor wine fund by send­ing much-appre­ci­at­ed dol­lars our way. Head over to Patre­on if you’d care to join them and earn your own fab­ri­cat­ed biog­ra­phy


Jacques Debrot

(Moon Rock Tier)

Grew up on a farm in the Cum­ber­land Moun­tains, where his fam­i­ly raised a rare breed of two-head­ed tab­by cat. There are unsub­stan­ti­at­ed claims on the inter­net of Jacques being a “con­de­scend­ing butthead,” but con­flict­ing reports describe him as “bril­liant” so for now we reserve judgment.

Kyle Sundby

( Mer­cer & Manci­ni Tier )

Is a near-expert in karate best known for his respectable-but-not-quite-chest-explod­ing round­house kick. He is gen­er­ous of spir­it and an excel­lent woodsman.

Derek Gray

( Mod­ern Diony­sus Tier )

Invent­ed blue­ber­ry pan­cakes at the age of nine, before join­ing the cir­cus and becom­ing a world-renowned human can­non­ball. His research into brain can­cer is groundbreaking.

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