Johnny America

 

Pa­rade

by

“It start­ed at 2am with a frozen turkey and went down­hill from there. I’m just hap­py to know that I’m not the on­ly one who has shit­ty days.” — Dad

In truth, Thanks­giv­ing start­ed at 8:27 pm, Wednes­day evening, with a call to my cell from a pay­phone in Tren­ton. I keep my cell in my back pock­et and I have a beefy ass. I did­n’t hear it the first two times it rang. I did hear it on the third ring, at 8:36.

“I went to New York today.”

“Then why are you call­ing from New Jer­sey?” The num­ber had come through on caller-ID and I had looked up the area code af­ter miss­ing the first two calls.

“Fun­ny sto­ry. I’ll tell you lat­er. I’m not call­ing be­cause I need you to get me. I’m just bored.”

“Why did you go to New York?”

“A con­fer­ence. It was fun. Now I’m just wait­ing for the train. Could you do me a fa­vor? I need to know when the next one leaves for Wilmington.”

I looked it up. “About half an hour ago. Do you need me to get you?”

“I’ll see if the shut­tle is run­ning. I’ll call if I need you.”

I wait­ed an hour then went to bed. The bird was set to go on at 2am. It was my first time and Dad was go­ing wake me up in the mid­dle of the night to walk me through the fam­i­ly recipe. I had asked him to.

I was down for 2 ½ hours. The phone rang at midnight.

“I took the shut­tle to Nor­ris­town. The morn­ing train runs in a few hours. I’ll wait at the McDick’s. I talked to the In­di­an guy that runs the place and he’s cool with it.”

The McDonald’s on Markley. The same one that was held-up last week. It had been in the paper.

I pulled up to the curb at 12:30.

“One guy of­fered to give me a ride. An­oth­er tried chat­ting me up. An­oth­er one of­fered me $40. That would be giv­ing it away.”

I agreed. No less than $100, on sale. We hit the high­way, head­ed for Wilm­ing­ton. The con­ver­sa­tion was nice. I was al­ready on the road and it was wet and be­ing up­set now wouldn’t do any good.

We were there, she was through the door, and I was go­ing north again by 1:30. There was no chance of get­ting back on time, but I wouldn’t be more than a few min­utes late.

I came up to the onramp.

I’d nev­er been through a so­bri­ety check­point be­fore. The cop asked me two ques­tions that took less than a minute, but the ramp was backed up for a quar­ter mile.

“Fuck me. It’s still frozen.” I was 20 min­utes be­hind, but Dad was still wrist-deep in the turkey when I came in. The first thing was to get the bird thawed.

I have a prob­lem with drains. Not a pho­bia; a dis­gust. There are oth­er things I’d rather do than get close to one. Like my tax­es. The low­er to the ground, the worse it gets. Floor drains and tub drains are not even safe to look at. The drains by a pool or in a lock­er room, mount­ed by a wad of bub­ble gum, cor­rod­ed and hairy, per­haps with the cov­er of a safe­ty ra­zor stuck in the grill; these are the worst. Laun­dry basins and bath­room sinks are not as bad, but not much bet­ter. Of all the types, kitchen sink drains are al­most the least of­fen­sive. With them, I on­ly have to hold my fin­gers un­der hot wa­ter for a minute or two.

Un­for­tu­nate­ly, the most ef­fi­cient way to quick-thaw a turkey is a warm-wa­ter bath. There is no con­sid­er­a­tion for his sen­si­tive son’s is­sues. Fuck that — and he’s right. No dis­pen­sa­tion for pussies.

But my food was still touch­ing the drain. It was be­ing man­han­dled by ma­ni­acs, grap­pled and mauled and hosed down. Every sin­gle part of it rubbed against the bot­tom of the sink. If I had not known that it would be pu­ri­fied in fire, if I could not be sure, if I wasn’t go­ing to do it per­son­al­ly, I would have had the ham.

By the end, I was falling asleep stand­ing up.

Anne was over and every­one down­stairs was talk­ing too loud­ly and I’d left my bed­room door open and I’d on­ly got­ten five hours of sleep and I wasn’t go­ing to be able to shut my eyes again.

“Etta’s in the hospital.”

It wasn’t yet noon and the din­ner ta­ble was set with all the fine chi­na and the white ta­ble cloth and the yel­low nap­kins Mom had spent half an hour iron­ing last night.

“Jean said she was hav­ing trou­ble breath­ing. They’ve ad­mit­ted her and they’re go­ing to intubate.”

The ta­ble was set beau­ti­ful­ly. I’d slept through the pa­rade, of course. I haven’t seen the Spi­der-Man float since I was 11.

Din­ner was held at 3, then Dad and I were on our way to the hos­pi­tal. Jean had been with her all day. Every few min­utes, she had to gen­tly push Et­ta back down on­to the bed. Et­ta was try­ing to cough up the in­tu­ba­tion tube. Even­tu­al­ly, the nurs­es had to re­strain her.

I can feel the family’s cru­el­ty. It is a dis­ease of self­ish­ness that lies dor­mant most of the time. It on­ly erupts like a boil on the neck when enough of us come to­geth­er for some­thing like Thanks­giv­ing din­ner. Or it could come when some­one is sick. We milk our con­cerns for our sis­ter or aunt or moth­er, and then we turn and curse one an­oth­er and blame one an­oth­er and tell any­one who’ll lis­ten how no-good all of ‘them’ are. I can feel it, and I spread it all the same as any of us. To­day, I hat­ed Etta’s worth­less daugh­ters; one for be­ing a junkie and a con­vict, the oth­er for be­ing an in­grate who could not come to see her moth­er un­til her din­ner guests had left. They dis­gust me more than the kitchen drain.

But her daugh­ters are what she made them.

We sat by Etta’s bed­side for a few hours un­til her un­in­car­cer­at­ed daugh­ter showed up. Then Mom and Dad and Jean and I went home for coffee.

My phone buzzed on the ta­ble. I pressed the ‘si­lence’ but­ton and re­turned to the con­ver­sa­tion and a piece of cher­ry pie.

An­oth­er buzz.

“Someone’s try­ing to get a hold of you.”

“Thanks. I heard.” I si­lenced it again. I want­ed to at least get a start on my pie be­fore go­ing to an­oth­er room to an­swer it. I usu­al­ly went out­side, but it was still raining.

Buzz. I couldn’t ig­nore it again since no one else was. I tried to get up, but my shoe caught for a mo­ment be­tween the ta­ble leg and the chair.

“Thanks for tak­ing me home.” I went in­to the bath­room and shut the door. She sound­ed less con­fi­dent than last night when she said she’d wait all night alone. She was quieter.

“How was Thanks­giv­ing?” I was hop­ing for ‘good’.

“Un­event­ful. A fight with my mom.” I sat on the closed toi­let lid. This would take a while.

Skip to the punch line; “Tell me that you don’t care.”

“I don’t care.”

“Do you mean it?”

“It’s been a long day.” I didn’t want to tell her why it had been a long day, that it hadn’t been just her. I didn’t want to com­mit my­self to par­tic­i­pate any more than I al­ready had by pick­ing up.

“Do you mean it?” She liked to hit me with the hard ones when I was tired.

I told her to have a good night and I’d talk to her soon.

I went down­stairs and Jean had the eggnog out. I want­ed a few belts, but I nev­er had a taste for liquor and I was done with it be­fore I had the first glass down. Jean cleaned up the rest.

“Did you see the parade?”

She told me she hadn’t. She’d want­ed to, but she was al­ready head­ed for the hos­pi­tal by the time it started.

“Of course, we had our own lit­tle pa­rade here, didn’t we?” She smiled at me and it felt like she’d been sit­ting there be­side me since the first phone call the night be­fore. It felt nice to imag­ine that she knew everything.

“I guess we did.”

I de­cid­ed to give the eggnog an­oth­er try as Mom walked in­to the kitchen to bag up what was left of the turkey. My phone buzzed in my back pock­et, but I ig­nored it.

Filed under Fiction on March 11th, 2010

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