Johnny America

 

Pro­pos­al for a Michael Jack­son Stud­ies de­part­ment at the Uni­ver­si­ty of Kansas

by

With the movie-adap­ta­tion of Don DeLil­lo’s White Noise com­ing out in the near fu­ture, the ques­tion of how lit­er­a­ture af­fects pop­u­lar cul­ture is once again thrust in­to the lime-light. In White Noise, The pro­tag­o­nist is head of the Hitler Stud­ies de­part­ment and does­n’t know a lick of Ger­man. I don’t know how to dance, and that is why I’ve writ­ten this pro­pos­al for a Michael Jack­son Stud­ies Pro­gram at the Uni­ver­si­ty of Kansas:

Dear Chan­cel­lor Bob,

I did not ful­ly com­pre­hend the im­por­tance of Jacko un­til a few loose as­so­ci­a­tions came together:

  1. I once dat­ed a girl whose face was on Michael Jack­son’s mag­a­zine cov­er. I had no idea that he had a magazine.
  2. Thriller might have been cool, but I was trau­ma­tized as a child by it. This may ex­plain why I’ve re­vert­ed to lov­ing the J5 over “P.Y.T.” or “Bil­ly Jean.”
  3. Bub­bles. Bub­bles was the glue that made G‑n-R gui­tarist Slash friends with Mike be­cause of their mu­tu­al love of pets.
  4. My room­mate did­n’t know how to take a birth­day cake with a frost­ing-com­posed sim­u­lacrum of Jack­o’s post-sur­gi­cal schnoz on top of it.

The pre­vi­ous point was the cat­a­lyst for this pro­pos­al. Like a blind­ing flash, Q.E.D., Eu­re­ka, I had dis­cov­ered it! That danc­ing ma­chine and his über-chis­eled nose on a two-di­men­sion­al cake is in­dica­tive of every­thing that makes Amer­i­can cul­ture ap­pear de­spi­ca­bly sac­cha­rine, lu­di­crous, su­per­fi­cial and re­pul­sive, yet, odd­ly glam­orous and alluring.

Jack­son’s in­famy and fame; his in­no­cence and guilt; mar­riage and pe­dophil­ia; op­u­lent wealth and fore­cast­ed pover­ty; black­ness and white­ness; adult­hood and lack of ma­tu­ri­ty; nat­ur­al nose and sur­gi­cal up­dates; claims of hon­esty and ob­vi­ous omis­sions of truth; drop the ba­by or not, these rep­re­sent all of Amer­i­ca’s in­ter­nal di­a­logues, con­flicts, and per­haps their resolution.

Af­ter all, who can ar­gue that they are not in an ex­is­ten­tial dilem­ma, when one is faced with cut­ting a pop god’s de­ranged fa­cial struc­ture or hon­or­ing the icon­ic sta­tus? What would you choose? Do you nib­ble? Where did this dilem­ma come from? Is this cake copy­right­ed? Who ac­tu­al­ly put him on­to the cake? Did they feel as dirty as I imag­ined? Was it a joke, or in earnest?

I think that we can all rec­og­nize that the true ori­gin of this dilem­ma lies in the ubiq­ui­tous­ly resid­ual cul­tur­al ram­i­fi­ca­tions of slav­ery. One need on­ly jux­ta­pose Jack­o’s cake-face with Pi­cas­so’s ground-break­ing cu­bist paint­ing “Les Demoi­selle’s D’av­i­gnon” to re­al­ize Michael Jack­son’s ge­nius. He has clev­er­ly con­tin­ued the cen­turies-old di­a­logue be­tween African culture(specifically African masks), African Amer­i­can iden­ti­ty, and pop­u­lar Amer­i­can culture.

Fur­ther re­search and fund­ing must be giv­en to this sub­ject. Michael Jack­son em­bod­ies a large amount of the fences strad­dled, the metaphor­i­cal bound­aries, and ten­sions but­tress­ing Amer­i­can cul­ture. I hope that I have gained your sup­port in mak­ing KU, po­ten­tial­ly, one of the cul­tur­al mec­cas of the world.

Your pal,

Ian

Filed under Letters on January 10th, 2005

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