Johnny America Play­er


I just can’t help my­self. It’s just too easy. A shiv­er nev­er fails to find its way through my spine as I en­ter in the ad­dress in­to my brows­er. I al­most feel guilty; al­most, but why lam­baste my­self over ideas of such in­con­se­quence. These women need me, they are not aware of this yet, but soon it will be re­vealed to them. En­ter­ing in my pass­word, the ex­cite­ment mounts. Who will be my choice to­day? Per­haps Chicka_715, in­tel­li­gent, fun, and en­er­getic, sound like the kind of women most men would adore. Or maybe Lyzard964, fun and spon­ta­neous, an an­i­mal lover nonethe­less, per­haps she will be my pick.

I con­tin­ue to scan, painstak­ing­ly de­con­struct­ing each sen­tence of each pro­file for a glimpse at the women with­in. There is an art to the in­ter­pre­ta­tion of these short but telling de­scrip­tions, one must know how to read be­tween the lines. For in­stance, I can clear­ly see that Christy_78 is com­pen­sat­ing for her ro­man­tic short­com­ings by spend­ing too much time at the gym. She de­scribes her­self as “hap­py go lucky,” but deep with­in they eyes of her pro­file pic­ture I see noth­ing but fear and mal­con­tent. It is my un­can­ny abil­i­ty to pick up on these nu­ances that af­ford me an ad­van­tage that is sec­ond to none. Each short email I send to these women will al­low them a chance to be­gin a spe­cial re­la­tion­ship, a re­la­tion­ship the likes of which they could nev­er have imag­ined. It is un­for­tu­nate­ly for that very rea­son that our time to­geth­er is lim­it­ed, for there are so many women re­turned up­on each search who are in ob­vi­ous need of my unique va­ri­ety of com­pan­ion­ship that I should nev­er dream of halt­ing my quest.

Filed under Commentary on September 10th, 2003

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Reader Comments

woman player wrote:

un­for­tu­nate­ly, no one ever speaks the truth on their pro­file. and if one could speak the un­speak­able truth, so many more would fall prey to the players.
what if i said, for in­stance, that i was a bi-po­lar nymphoman­ic? think i’d get more hits?
there is an ital­ian say­ing, when you think that you’re fuck­ing them… they’re re­al­ly fuck­ing you.
be warned that you are not a play­er, yet you are the one get­ting played. the truth be known, is that no one wants e‑love that lasts. we all grav­i­tate to va­ri­ety. men and women.

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