Letter to the Chorus of ‘FAME’ Years After I Sang Along to It With All My Heart
I am sorry so much time has passed since we last spoke. I regret even more what I said to you at that encounter. All I can say is that I was not myself. Perhaps that was who I once was but, I can assure you, I am no longer.
As the years have gone by, maturity and wisdom have embraced my life and I have realized how irrational my behavior was. Of course I now know that I am not gonna live forever. I was naïve to believe that. It was that kind of thinking that allowed me to address you so. I felt that no matter what I said, I would always have the time to repair the damage created. Now I only hope I can begin to mend our relationship with whatever time remains.
There were moments in our cruel last meeting that presently make no sense to me. That is how irrational I was at the time. I was wildly reaching for anything to hurl at you that had the potential to inflict pain. I’m gonna learn how to fly? I am not even sure what my intent was at that point. The logistics involved in owning and operating an aircraft must be staggering and hardly a reasonable alternative to established air passenger services. My words were senseless and inexcusable.
As poor as my behavior was, it was true that I was still optimistic. Indeed, I did feel it coming together. But my ravenous ego would not allow it. Insensitivity towards anything that was not me commanded my thoughts — I was actually excited that people would see me and cry. Yet still I saw no wrongdoing on my part. The belief that I still was gonna make it to heaven while threatening to light up the sky like a flame only showed the depths of my delusions.
None of us are gonna live forever and there is no better time to atone. What I once demanded out of spite I now ask out of shame and the wish to be forgiven.
Baby, remember my name.
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